Last week I was in my local shopping centre and at various times in various shops, I kept getting beeped at when walking in and walking out. You know, when the security scanners go off when you’re walking out because whatever it is you’ve bought hasn’t been scanned properly, or the tag hasn’t been removed.

But in my case, in the past week it’s been happening walking in as well as out of stores. I haven’t been the slightest bit embarrassed because I know I didn’t nick anything, but it did start to get annoying that the scanners would go off in almost every store I went into. It happened again yesterday in Tesco’s.

And by process of elimination, I’ve finally got it down to two things. It’s either the underwire in my new bra, or the chunky metal on my new leather messenger bag. I bought both and started wearing them around the same time and obviously I’ve changed clothes a few times since so I can only deduce it’s one of these two.

Boy, it’s going to be fun going through airport security when I go to Edinburgh in November. I’ll either have one or the other on me.